Thursday, February 27, 2014


Oh my, I'm back to my normal self and enjoying pregnancy again!  Two weeks ago I thought I wasn't going to be able to make it another six week with the excruciating pain I was in, but now I know that I can handle another four weeks, or more, just fine (I'm holding out that he'll arrive on St. Patrick's Day though.  How cool would that be for an Irish woman to have an Irish baby on St. Patrick's Day?!).  His movement is so much lower now and he'll give me a kick in my sore rib or muscle every once in a while but it's not constant all day long.  He sure is an active little boy who doesn't allow me to sleep as much as I need.  It's fun to watch people react to his strong movement now.  Both my IPs got to feel body parts moving across their hands this week!  It's pure joy watching them light up when he moves.  They were even able to see my belly move while we were having supper. 

36 weeks
It's a wise idea to do a tour of the hospital, mainly to make sure that everyone ends up at the correct location.  Fifteen minutes before our scheduled tour I got a phone call from my IPs and discovered that they were at Centracare Plaza instead of the hospital, it's totally an easy  mistake to make.  The plaza is giant and looks very much like a hospital.  I was able to guide them to the hospital  over the phone and they made it just in time.  We actually had a personal tour, I guess we were the only ones to sign up for that time, and our guide was an acquaintance of mine that I'd met through The Wizard of Oz.  She was a delightful tour guide and spent nearly two hours with us at the hospital.  She gave us wonderful information and shared stories about her experience as a labor and delivery nurse.  We're not her first surrogate couple, so it was nice to hear what others experienced while they were in the hospital.

I know most of you have loads of questions about how it all works in the hospital.  Here are a few answers to the most common questions...Some surrogates and IPs like the baby to be placed on the surrogate after delivery and she gets to "hand the baby" to the parents and it's very symbolic for them.  I have no desire to have him placed on me, and my image was always that he'd come out and go right into one of my IPs arms.  That's the plan...they'll be at my feet and ready to greet him upon his arrival.  I'll get my snuggle time when it's appropriate (I'm sure it'll be hours later and that's the way it should be!)  We'll hang out in the same room for a couple hours and then we'll end up in separate rooms for the remainder of our stay at the hospital.  I'm just going to see how I'm feeling when deciding if I should stay longer than the 24 hours or not.  I've heard from other surrogates that they enjoyed staying as long as they could because they got time with their IPs and the baby before going home, while others decided that they wanted to leave as soon as they could.  So, the answer to the other MAIN question, "Will your IPs be in the room when you deliver?" is ABSOLUTELY!  They watched him go into me when he was a 3 day old embryo, so they better be there to watch him take his first breath.  My husband and Mom will be there, along with a photographer who will take photos of the birth, and we're crossing our fingers that IP-B's sister will attend, too.  I imagine that it will be perfect.  My goal is to have another natural unmedicated delivery, so start sending positive thoughts and prayers my way!   

We headed to Chipotle for a late dinner after our tour.  It's crazy how we can just sit and visit and the time flies by!  Both of my IPs came into the restaurant super excited, it's really starting to feel more real for them.  For one, I actually look pregnant, and seeing the hospital where he's going to be born just makes things feel like it's actually happening.  I, on the other hand, have felt how real its been since the first Lupron injection and when I started vomiting.  It's so neat that they can feel and see the movement now, though.  It's so fun to hear the names that they have on the list that they're bringing to the hospital and how everything they have at home is coming together.  They've made decisions for this little guy long before he was created and I look at their decisions as parents and I'm in awe.  Some of the things that they have done for him have made me cry out of happiness.  This little boy will never need to question if he was ever wanted, desired, or loved.  He's got so much proof that he'll never ever have any of those thoughts!  I keep saying that he's one lucky little boy, and he is. Maybe he can be born on St. Patrick's Day and they can name him Lucky!?!?...just kidding, it's not on the list! It might be my nickname for him now...Lucky Leprechaun!  All jokes aside, he's bound to be a really cool kid!        

I'm fully aware that there is a lot of concern about my emotional well being after I have this little man.  I'd ask that all of you keep those thoughts and feelings to yourself or among you and your significant other.  I am not worried at all about the attachment issues after the baby is born, because there isn't a maternal feeling I have associated with this pregnancy or baby.  I realize that it's quite common for surrogates to be teary for the first couple weeks after delivery due to fluctuating hormones, and that is to be expected.  I'm going to have my placenta encapsulated to help with the hormones.  I feel when I hear people express their concern to me, then it makes me feel like I should be worried.  In fact, I felt slightly panicked this week when discussing these thoughts with my IPs over dinner after our tour.  I know it to be true, when you hear things about yourself from others that you start to believe them to be true about yourself.  So, I'd appreciate that you're all aware that I'm not worried about me and neither should you be!  It will be ok to talk about it if I bring it up (my husband and IPs are the only three are welcome to ask me anytime you'd like).  I expected this surrogacy experience to be amazing, but I've been blown away by how incredible it has been.  My IPs have become such amazing friends of ours and I don't imagine that things will change.  We are two families that are forever connected by this little boy, who I'll always have a special kind of love for, much like the love I have for my nieces and nephews!  Let all of your concerns rest in peace with the knowledge that this is something that I was truly called to do  :) 

This will bring a smile to anyone...

During our highs and lows at the dinner table this week, Jack told us that one of his highs was the surprise note that he left for us.  We had to go searching for it after we ate and this is what we found.  He's such a sweet little boy!

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